Growing Up in Spain: Why Moving Back to Britain Would Mean Leaving Home

My parents brought me to Spain when I was six. Now, raising three multilingual children, I understand just how much that decision gave me — and why I’d struggle to leave it behind.

People ask me two questions: what was it like growing up in Spain, and would I ever go back to the UK?

The first takes a bit of explaining. The second usually gets a fairly quick answer. I struggle to imagine leaving behind the life I have here, especially when I look at what Spain has given my children.

My parents brought me to Spain when I was six years old. I’m English by background, but Spain is where I grew up. It shaped how I speak, how I see people and what I consider normal. And the older I get, the more grateful I am that my parents brought me here.

More Than Sunshine

When people picture a childhood in southern Spain, they tend to think of beaches, sunshine and holidays. Of course, those things are lovely. But living somewhere is different from visiting for a fortnight.

For me, the biggest benefit was growing up around different cultures.

On the Costa del Sol, you can have Spanish neighbours, British friends, a Dutch colleague and a conversation with someone from Scandinavia, all in the same afternoon. Germans, Finns, Norwegians, Danes, Russians and Ukrainians have all been part of the communities I’ve known here.

I once joked that if you wanted to learn Dutch, you could book a flight to Málaga and stay in Marbella. Some days, you hear enough Dutch to wonder whether you’ve landed in the wrong country.

That mixture becomes ordinary when you grow up with it. You aren’t constantly thinking about where everybody comes from. You get to know them as people.

The School Move That Changed Everything

My Spanish wasn’t always good. In fact, when I was younger, it was terrible.

I went to various British schools, where much of my education and everyday conversation happened in English. I was living in Spain, but I wasn’t properly immersed in the language.

Then, at around twelve, I moved into a Spanish state school.

That changed everything.

Suddenly, Spanish was how I had to understand lessons, make friends and join in. I couldn’t keep falling back on English and expect everyone else to do the work.

I describe it as going from speaking twenty per cent Spanish to a hundred per cent. Those aren’t exam results; they’re my way of explaining how dramatic the difference felt.

The language became part of everyday life. Along with it came a better understanding of the humour, the expressions and the way people related to each other.

Looking back, that move was one of the most valuable parts of my upbringing.

Learning to Live Together

There’s something useful about discovering early that your family’s way of doing things isn’t the only way.

Different households have different food, habits, languages and expectations. You learn to be comfortable with that. You also learn that respecting someone’s culture doesn’t mean losing your own.

I wouldn’t pretend everyone on the coast gets along perfectly. People argue here, just as they do anywhere. But my experience has been of people from different backgrounds getting on with their lives alongside one another.

That has stayed with me. I’m interested in where people come from, but I don’t need them to come from the same place as me to feel comfortable around them.

Watching My Children Grow Up

Now I have three children, and I see the benefits through them.

All three speak, read and write English, Spanish and Portuguese fluently. To them, moving between languages is normal.

As a parent, that makes me proud. They can speak to more people, understand more conversations and feel at home in more than one language.

Then there’s the food.

My children will ask for octopus, calamari, fish, rice and salads. That’s ordinary food to them. I know plenty of British children enjoy those things too, but I love that mine have grown up comfortable trying them.

It’s a small detail, perhaps, but it says something about their upbringing. Different tastes and experiences have been there from the beginning.

For our family, I believe that has been a good way to grow up.

Saying What You Think

Another thing I appreciate about life here is the directness I’ve experienced.

People can be outspoken. They’ll tell you what they think, disagree with you and carry on talking afterwards. I like knowing where I stand.

When I look at some conversations coming out of the UK, I sometimes feel people are more worried about saying the wrong thing than explaining what they actually mean.

Discussions can become arguments about labels before anyone has listened properly.

That frustrates me, and it’s part of why moving back doesn’t appeal.

I can only speak from my own experience. Spain has its own sensitivities and disagreements. But I’ve often felt more comfortable here having a straightforward conversation, including with people who see things differently.

Being able to speak honestly matters to me. So does being prepared to hear an honest answer back.

Where I Belong

People sometimes ask whether I feel English or Spanish.

I’m English by background. I speak English, Spanish and Portuguese, as well as some Dutch and Romanian, and I understand some Russian. Different parts of my life have helped me learn different things.

I don’t feel a need to squeeze all of that into one answer.

Would I ever live in the UK again? Circumstances can change, so I wouldn’t say never. But Spain is home.

My parents gave me the chance to grow up here. At six, I couldn’t have understood how much their decision would shape my life.

Now, watching my own children switch between languages and grow into themselves, I understand it much better.